Tips to Unravel Our Social Anxiety Spiral

As humans, we are designed to connect. This is a basic need that fuels our desire to be seen and valued by others through interaction and acceptance. As a result, we are prepared to be wary of possible rejection in social situations, which can make us overly conscious of how people perceive us and cause anxiety. In general, this feeling of anxiety is a normal and healthy feeling that everyone experiences. This is how our brain signals us to pay attention to something important and even prepare for action. However, this normal sense of anxiety can become disordered when we experience disproportionate feelings of distress around anticipated judgment or rejection in social situations. In response to this distress, we often begin to avoid taking calculated risks in our career or engaging in meaningful interactions which can have lasting, negative impacts on our personal and professional lives. Tadalafil 20 Mg Tablet and Tadalista 60 are used to treat erectile dysfunction & impotence in men. Tadalafil is the most important ingredient of medicines.


Anyone who has ever experienced social anxiety knows that the spiral it takes us down is tightly wound and hard to escape. The spiral usually starts with some automatic negative thought patterns that show up in the form of self-doubt or mind-reading, assuming others are perceiving us negatively, and it ends with an experience that we store in our memory as evidence that we aren’t equipped to deal with potential rejection and should avoid such interactions. In response to this stressful input, our bodies begin to clench up, our hearts beat intensely, there is tension in our chest or stomach, and if we’re one of those lucky ones, we may even experience sweating in places we didn’t previously think possible. This dysregulation can make us feel like our body has betrayed us and fill us with feelings of shame (I.E., that something is wrong with us). As a last resort, we may resort to common sayings of encouragement such as “keep calm and be yourself,” but that is not only an ineffective way of dealing with problems, it’s just that you quickly realize it’s a contributing factor. This is contributing to our problem. Thinking is completely offline, making it more difficult than usual to construct sentences or participate in important conversations. 


As a result, our strategies for alleviating the above illnesses include avoidance, intense rumination to get rid of past mistakes, drug use of alcohol and other substances, anticipating future anxiety-inducing scenarios, and then trying to avoid them. It often involves constant concern to protect yourself. As you can imagine, none of these tactics work. At least not in the long run. These avoidant behaviors only reinforce our unhelpful belief that these social interactions are too overwhelming and that we can’t handle them, creating a feedback loop of a heightened anxiety response when these situations inevitably present themselves again. 


So, instead of perpetuating our social anxiety by avoiding social situations, public speaking engagements, presentations, or other critical interactions we’ll have in our personal and professional lives, we need to find useful ways to build our tolerance for this discomfort we experience and employ practical strategies at the moment to move through it. Here are some simple tips to unravel that spiral we get stuck in when dealing with social anxiety: 


Interrupt the unhelpful thoughts driving your social anxiety and begin to create a more nuanced narrative of who you are that’s built on actual evidence. Say these out loud to a trusted other or even to yourself to interrupt the shame cycle that anxiety takes us down. Remember, just because you feel awkward or inadequate in certain situations doesn’t mean that you are. Or, just because you’ve had difficult interactions in the past doesn’t mean the same scenario will repeat itself over and over again. 


Expose yourself to situations that cause social anxiety. Yes, that’s right. Approach situations you want to avoid with caution. Build a hierarchy of tolerance, starting with minor stressors that cause social anxiety and working your way up to completely avoiding stressors. Start climbing the ladder slowly. 


Get yourself in shape. To effectively train your social skills and actively engage with others, your nervous system must first be calm. The best way to do this is through deep breathing, such as the 4-7-8 technique or square breathing, and grounding skills such as 5-4-3-2-1, and mindfulness to help us to return to the present moment. Practice these skills during non-stressful times to gain experience. Let go of perfection. Develop a growth mindset by asking yourself what skills and supports you need to acquire to participate more effectively in social situations. No one gets it right every time, so stop making unrealistic assumptions that you should. 


Practice coping strategies in advance. Who would you like to have support in a socially awkward situation, or what kind of support do you need when you need it, including but not limited to breathing, grounding, reflective listening, mindfulness, etc? Think about how you can use your skills. Write down your goals for overcoming social anxiety. Start small and be realistic. Remember to keep an eye on your achievements and growth along the way. This also helps with an important consideration of why you might want to change the way you deal with anxiety in the first place. What are you missing out on what’s important to you because of your social anxiety? Make these part of your goal list. 


Get support. Social anxiety is one of the most common problems people suffer from. So you’re not alone, but that doesn’t mean you have to suffer forever. If you’ve tried to break this pattern and feel like you’ve had little success, consider asking for help. Exposure therapy and cognitive-behavioral therapy are common evidence-based interventions used by therapists to help people manage their fears. Practice patience and compassion as you begin to engage in new ways. It’s not easy and takes time, but it’s worth it.


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